Conflictions
by pixie blue
Summary: Songfic. Still struggling with her newfound powers, Piper worries that the Binding is changing her for the worst. Afraid that she'll hurt anyone who gets close, she tries to push the others away, but will she pay the ultimate price? AxP. T to be safe.


A/N: So, my first Storm Hawks fanfiction, and it's a songfic too, something else I've never done. This fic is kind of an alternate extended ending for episode 51. The song is Let Me Go, but it was also kind of inspired by When I'm Gone (see if you can find the line I used from that song! Cyber cookies for anyone who does!). It takes a while to actually get to the song (about halfway), so sorry about that. Oh, and please review! I reply to all my readers who take the time to review, and I accept anonymous reviews and flamers (though I hope not to get too many of the latter). Just tell me what you think. Don't want to seem like a review hog, but I really want to improve my writing.

Storm Hawks belong to Nerd Corps. Let Me Go (and When I'm Gone) belong to 3 Doors Down.

pixie out.

.:':. .:':. .:':.

She stared out into the night sky, the serenity of the stars masking the horrors that dawn would bring. Taking a few gulps of the cold air, Piper tried to calm herself. Tried and failed. Her mind still whirled with the implications of what she had learnt that day – this strange new power, supposedly evil... it was all a bit too much. She had hoped to get some time alone, but no such luck. Without moving, she asked, "Any reason you're out here, Aerrow?"

He rested his arms on the balcony next to hers, a wry grin on his face. "How'd you know it was me?"

The corner of her mouth lifted briefly. "I could tell by your footsteps." He nodded, not that she could see. "So, are you going to answer my question? Why are you out here?" She spun and faced him, eyes searching.

"Uh, um, well..." he stammered, caught off guard. It was hard to tell in the dim light coming from the _Condor_, but it looked like he was blushing. "I-I came looking for you."

She rolled her eyes. "That much is obvious. Why?"

Yes, definitely blushing. "I've been thinking... Today is the first time that I've really begun to doubt if we can win this war. I mean, not that Atmosia won't win, but now that we've seen how much power Cyclonis really has..." he trailed off, not willing to finish that train of thought.

"So, what's your point?"

"Maybe the price to pay is too high," he muttered. Emerald eyes met amber. "Maybe we're not as invincible as we thought." He took a deep breath, wanting to say it before he thought of the repercussions and stopped himself. "Maybe there's some stuff we should get out, before it's too late. No holding back." He ran a hand through his auburn hair, chuckling nervously. "This is really something I should have told you earlier. Or _someone_, at least. But, I figure it'd be best if I just told you." He forced himself to stop rambling. "Piper... Over the years, everyone has been like a family to me. But somewhere among the jokes and the missions and the crazy, death-defying stunts, I...I fell in love."

She turned her head away stared into nothingness, voice tight. "It's taken you long enough to admit it. You know, we all saw it a mile off."

His eyes widened in disbelief. "Y-You did? Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

She whirled to face him again, angry tears welling up. "Because it hurt too much! Because somewhere among the jokes, the missions, and the crazy, death-defying stunts I fell in love with _you_! Because it's not like you have any feelings back, I'm just the nagging older sister. Not when I can see you're in love with Finn." She turned her head, trying to hide her sniffles.

He stood dumbfounded for a few seconds, until the shock wore off. Then he burst out laughing. She turned back to him, surprised. "You thought... Me... _Finn_?" he choked out between fits of laughter. He looked up her, biting back the giggles, but her expression sent him over again. He doubled over, tears of mirth streaming down his face.

She stepped back and crossed her arms, waiting for him to recover. He wiped his eyes on his sleeve, still chuckling. "Thanks, Piper. I think I needed that."

Scowling, she replied, "Can you please tell me what that was about?"

He smothered his laughter. "I'm sorry, that was just too funny. Finn... I love him, but not that way. He's like an annoying little brother, even though he's technically older. The person I was talking about was, well – you." He ducked his head in embarrassment.

"Oh. " One word, then it was her turn to be silent. "...Why didn't you tell me earlier?" she asked softly, echoing his words from before.

He sighed, stalling."I'm a coward, and a selfish one too. I only really thought about how much it would hurt me if you said no. Truth is, I didn't really bother to think how you would feel about it." He coloured again. "How awkward it would be for you, knowing that I liked you more than a friend, and maybe you'd somehow feel guilty for not loving me back."

Looking up, he was startled to see that she had sidled over until their elbows were almost touching. "Those are the same reasons I never told you." Her face seemed to grow closer, her voice even softer. "But now that we both know..." Their faces were only inches apart. Aerrow raised his hand to the side of her face, brushing away her tears, rubbing circles on her cheeks with his thumb. Linking her arms around his neck, she closed the distance, their lips slowly touching.

The kiss was warm, sweet, and set his every nerve on fire. He pulled her closer, her body moulding perfectly to his. Hands clutched in his hair, Piper returned his passion with vigour. She pulled back for a moment, panting, then pushed her lips against his again. _So soft..._ he thought. Her spicy, exotic scent was everywhere. _She_ was everywhere. "Piper..." he gasped out between kisses. "Why did we wait so long?"

"Don't know," she mumbled between pressing her lips to his. "Biggest... mistake... we ever... made." She shoved him against the wall of the _Condor_, pressing herself closer, peppering him with kisses. Eventually, they pulled apart and slid down the wall, trying to catch their breath. "Do you think... the others... will mind?"

His teeth flashed in the low light. "I have a feeling... they already saw it... a mile off."

She tucked her head under his chin. "I'm sorry I was such a coward, Aerrow. I could have saved us a lot of pain if I had the guts to tell you sooner."

His chest jiggled with laughter, her head bouncing along with it. "Piper, I'm as much at fault as you are. We've already moved on from that, and we can laugh at it now. I just did." This earned him a smile. "Besides," he gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "We've told each other now, and that's what matters."

Softly, her lips sought his again. He twisted himself so that he was lying on his side, giving her easier access. This kiss was slower, sweeter. The fire still raged, but not like the all-consuming inferno it had been before. There was time to enjoy all of the kiss. It was even better.

His eyes were closed, so he didn't see hers suddenly fizzle with purple light. He did, however, feel her tense, and then go slack in his arms. Alarmed, he pulled away to see her slipping into unconsciousness. "Piper!" he cried.

_"Piper..."_ The desperate plea came through distorted. She tried to battle against the fog enveloping her, but she quickly sank into its depths.

"Leave me alone, Cyclonis!" she screamed, recognising the desolate landscape. Twisting around, she searched for the mind-penetrating teenage dictator.

Mirthless laughter echoed everywhere as she materialised in front of Piper. "Why, you seem a little angry," she observed with fake innocence. "Did I interrupt something? I'm sorry, I seem to do that a lot."

Piper crumbled to the ground, sobbing. Switching from kissing Aerrow to having her mind invaded so quickly was messing with her emotions. "Why can't you just leave me alone?" she choked, flinching when the young empress put a reassuring arm around her shoulder.

"I'm only trying to help you, Piper." Mock concern filled her voice. "And this is the thanks I get."

"I don't need your help!" Piper shoved violently at Cyclonis, only for her to give way as she always did in this dream-land. Clumsily, Piper managed to roll into a crouch rather than face-plant. She cursed herself for her sudden breakdown. Now wasn't the time.

Cyclonis stood in front of her again, smirking superiorly. "Don't kid yourself, Piper. You _do_ need my help. You want it. Deep down, somewhere, you want to let the Binding take over. It's easy, you know. Just let the power guide you." Her violet orbs narrowed to slits. "Join me, and we could achieve anything. You could have everything you want. I know how you think, Piper, better than you do. Part of you is fighting this, but part of you is gone."

"And what I have left is going to resist you as long as it can! Get. Out. Of. My. HEAD!" With sheer willpower, Piper wrenched her mind free of Cyclonis' clutches. Returning to herself with a jolt that might have had something to do with being shaken by Aerrow, his tear-stained face quickly snapped back into focus. Hastily, he dried his eyes. Not many had seen him cry before, and Piper pretended not to notice.

"Are... Are you okay?" The question was tentative. Quiet. Like he was afraid if he was too loud, she would break.

"Cyclonis was in my head again, but she's gone... for now." She buried her head into his shoulder.

"Don't ever do that again," he whispered into her hair, pulling her into a tight embrace.

She twisted her head and looked up at him. "You really think I did that on purpose? It's not something I can stop. She's the one in control..." Abruptly, she pulled away from him. "I'm sorry, Aerrow." She ran back inside.

"Piper, wait!" She ignored him, dashing tears from her eyes and fleeing to her room, also ignoring the questioning glances of her teammates.

Finn looked up from his magazine to stare at Aerrow as he shot past. "Dude, what did you do?" he shouted at his leader's retreating form.

He didn't pause to give Finn an answer, but in the end, he still wasn't fast enough. The door slammed in his face, locked. He almost crashed straight into it. "Am I really that bad a kisser?" he asked the door, bracing his arms against it.

Piper gave a strangled laugh. "No, you're a great kisser, Aerrow. _I'm_ the one with a problem." He banged on the door and, due to some sort of miracle, the lock clicked open. She froze in the middle of stowing some crystals into her backpack.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

She smiled sadly, shoving some more crystals into her bag. "Packing. What does it look like?"

Shocked, but quickly overcoming his initial reaction, he crossed the space in two strides and trapped her wrists with one hand. Their faces were inches apart.

_One more kiss could be the best thing_

She looked away from him. "I can't do this, Aerrow. I-I don't love you."

_But one more lie could be the worst_

He gave a short bark of laughter. "Piper, you can't kiss me the way you did and then expect me to believe that. What is it really?"

"The Binding," she whispered, tears starting to streak down her face. "It's changing me."

_And all these thoughts are never resting_

"Let me help you with it. This isn't something you should bear alone."

_And you're not something I deserve_

She shook her head, the tears flowing freely. She had had more than her fair share of crying for the day. She was sick of it. "Don't you understand? It's not something you can help me with. It's making me bad, just like _her_. I...I don't know how much longer I can resist it. Part of me is already gone, that's what's really scaring me. That part of me_ wants_ it.Besides, you shouldn't have to suffer too." She fixed him with a steely gaze. "You're too good to waste yourself on me."

Aerrow dropped her hands. "You can't say that! Piper, I love you. Do you really think it'll hurt less if you become like Cyclonis when I've done nothing to help, rather than when I've done everything I can?"

"So you think I'm going to go evil on you?"

He tried to backpedal. "No, I only said _if_..."

More crystals and other essentials disappeared into her pack. She focused solely on her task, knowing if she looked at Aerrow's pained expression, she would give in and stay. "Aerrow, it's the nature of the Binding," she explained steadily. "It'll keep manifesting until I either give into the evil or until it kills me. I love you too, and I could never do that to you." As much as it would hurt her to leave him, she knew she had to. It was the only way to protect him, and the others – though she tacked the end of that thought on rather belatedly.

_In my head there's only you now_

_This world falls on me_

"And you think that just leaving will make it any easier?"

_In this world there's real and make believe_

_And this seems real to me_

Her hands stilled; she had packed everything she would need, and besides, she had just reasoned this out with herself.. "Yes."

_You love me but you don't know who I am_

_I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand_

_And you love me but you don't know who I am_

_So let me go_

_Let me go_

Shouldering her laden bag, she walked out of her room. He chased after her again. "Don't try to stop me, Aerrow. It's better for all of us this way. Less... Painful." It pained her so much already to do this.

_I dream ahead to what I hope for_

_And I turn my back on loving you_

Why did he have to make it harder? She sighed – it would have been easier if they had never kissed.

_How can this love be a good thing_

_When I know what I'm going through?_

As soon as Aerrow had left, Finn raced off to find the others. Despite what people seemed to think, he wasn't _completely_ oblivious about girls; he knew that something big was happening with Piper, and he was determined to find out what. He had told the others the little that he knew of the situation, and they had agreed it needed to be checked out. They converged on Piper and Aerrow. "Okay, I think we deserve to know what's going on." Finn demanded.

She sighed tiredly, closing her eyes, knowing that looking at them would make her stay, think of a thousand reasons why she shouldn't leave. And that was what would get them all killed. "I'm leaving." This was met with various protests. She squeezed her lids tighter; she had been trying to avoid this.

"Have you been infected with _mindworms_? We're in the middle of a war! You're the only one who has a chance, slim as it is, of not getting immediately killed when facing Master Cyclonis! We'll be more doomed than usual if you go!" A pleading edge entered Stork's voice, his eye twitching frantically.

"Dude, for once, Stork's right! With you gone, Cyclonis would totally cream us. We wouldn't last two seconds!" Finn protested.

Junko's question was simple, and full of his usual innocence. "Why?"

_You love me but you don't know who I am_

_I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand_

_You love me but you don't know who I am_

_So let me go_

Once the barrage was over, she opened her eyes again, but still not looking any of them in the eye. She took a deep breath. "The Binding is making me evil. I can feel it. You guys are family to me, and I'm not going to risk hurting you. Even-" Her voice cracked. "-Even if it hurts me."

_Just let me go..._

_Let me go_

"You'll be hurting us by leaving!" Aerrow had found his voice again. "We can help you through this."

"Why aren't you listening to me?" she shouted, the tears running again. "The Binding is _evil_. It's not something I can stop; it's not something any of you can stop! All I can do is leave to protect you, so I won't be able to hurt you! Just let me do this one thing, my last good act. Let me save you from me."

_And no matter how hard I try_

_I can't escape these things inside I know_

_I know..._

Aerrow pulled her into a fierce embrace. She squirmed but couldn't escape his grip. "You're wrong," he growled. "We _can_ help you, and we will. We're not letting you leave us."

She pushed her hands against his chest, her eyes narrowed. "So what are you going to do? Lock me up in my room? Keep me here against my will?"

"If that's what it takes," he said softly. "I'd rather you hate me forever than have you leave me forever." She felt her resolve weakening. How easy it would be to stay, to just ignore the feelings, ignore the Binding... If anyone could make her cave, it was Aerrow – and he knew it. "Piper..." He lifted her chin so she had no choice but to meet his gaze. "We really can help, you know. I understand that it might be hard, but that's what I'm here for, right? Come on, we can't let something like this get to us."

_When all the pieces fall apart_

_You will be the only one who knows_

_Who knows..._

Frustrated tears sprang up in her eyes. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen! They were supposed to be shrinking back in fear, fear that the Binding would destroy them all! They were _not_ supposed be so understanding! They were too good for her. She was tainted. They weren't. It should be simple. She felt like punching Aerrow's chest, like a toddler would. Instead, she went slack in his arms, as if she was giving in. This time, her gambles paid off, his arms loosening. She quickly slid out of his grasp and dashed away.

_You love me but you don't know who I am_

_I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand_

_And you love me but you don't know who I am_

_So let me go_

_Just let me go_

She had underestimated his reflexes. Quick as lightning, he spun and caught her by the wrist. "Piper," he pleaded. "At least let us try."

_And you love me but you don't_

Shaking her head sadly, she pulled herself away from him again and ran for the front of the ship. _You're too good for me, Aerrow_, she thought. _You all are_.

_You love me but you don't_

Feet pounding, he raced after her, trying to catch her before she reached the hangar bay, and ultimately, the skimmers. The others followed close behind. Skidding to a halt, he saw her clamber onto her Heliscooter.

_You love me but you don't know who I am_

Powerless to stop her, he watched the scooter fly away. He felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. Too late... He was too late. A crushing sense of failure almost sent him to his knees. The remainder of the team came up behind him, the sorrow thick in the air as they watched the Heliscooter grow steadily smaller and smaller.

"This is just like last time she left, isn't it? It's not real. She'll be back... Won't she?" Junko's pleas fell on deaf ears. They just stared numbly at the retreating speck. Slowly it dawned on him that this _was_ real. Very, very real.

_And you love me but you don't_

After what seemed an eternity, the remaining the Storm Hawks drifted off to various parts of the _Condor_ until only the blonde and the redhead were left on the landing strip.Finn rested a hand on Aerrow's shoulder. "Dude..." His voice quavered.

_You love me but you don't_

"...She's not coming back."

_You love me but you don't know me._


End file.
